what a sick sonofabitch

Last night at Ravari room happy hour i glanced across the bar, and to my dismay i saw a guy digging deep into his nose. I continued to watch him inspect the dirty morsel he freshly ripped out of his nasal passage and wipe it on the straw of a drink 2 bar stools away from him. He then started to sip his drink as is nothing happened. I waited for awile to see the person come back and drink from the booger straw, but i was in the middle of a pool game.

the new cleveland browns punter has a hulk hogan mustache

I love this guy! his name is Scott Player, he is the new cleveland browns punter, and he kicks some serious ass! another reason he rules is because he sports this hilarious face mask.

I didn't even have a chance...

Today was my court hearing for a parking violation/towing i decided to challenge. I was the first person to sign in, hence the first person to have a hearing. It was approaching 2:00 (court time)and i was talking to these to women in the lobby about why i was there. There were pics on my digital camera to support my case, so the ladies agreed to look at them and listen to my little presentation. I showed them pictures and explained why it wasn't fair, they seemed sympathetic. I took my camera back from the one woman and said "so.... i think its pretty fair to say i will win my case" I heard slow clapping and looked to my left, there was an older gentleman looking at me and clapping. He introduced himself as the court officer and a lady he was with called my name out. So... i followed them into the court room. He said "mr. fernengel, would you like to give me your presentation again?" So i did, i went thru the same routine, he smiled and said "nice try, you put your heart into it, but the violation stands... good day to you"

young medical student

This is an old story i thought about today. years back there was a wild bunch from Cleveland who lived at 24 northwood aka the Clevo-House. Anyways, they had really crazy parties. One time this "loose nut" decided to jump down the staircase. (roughly 20 steps) Upon hitting the floor he was knocked unconscience. Several of the revelers gathered around, and we began to panic. Then came our hero..... This guy walks over slow and cocky and says "everybody just settle down, i am a young med student here at OSU." He proceeds to crouch down and checks his pulse. "Okay, he is alive and his heart rate is stable, is there any smelling salt or hot sauce here?" My friend goes to the fridge and comes back with some Taco bell fire sauce and a near empty bottle of Frank's hot sauce. The young med student squirts the sauce onto his hands and rubs the sauce into the kid's lips, nose, ears, and eyes. He comes to and styarts screaming, my fucking eyes are burning! I cant see shit! What the fuck? ahhhhhhhhh! He got up and started flailing around the living room violently. For the rest of the night i called him "hot sauce williams" and thats all i remember

lee keeler look alike?

Anyone who knows lee keeler... This is a still from a Beavis and Butthead episode. I think the background character is a sure shot for lee Keeler, do you?

meat stroller

So i was riding my cruiser bike thru the "ghetto Kroger" parking lot on high and king ave. I was riding right by the front doors when a crazy man came racing out the front door pushing a stroller right towards me. I turned hard away causing my bike to lock up and fall. The guy turns quickly away and the stroller tips over. (At this point im freaking out cuz i think i caused a baby to hit the asphalt) To my delight, there was no baby, as i watched the guy quickly start picking up steaks/porkchops/and ground chuck. He gathered what he could in 4 seconds and started sprinting across the parking lot, leaving behind various cuts.

cat tattoo dream

well.... here is my dream from last night

i had to watch Ron and Cara's cat (not sure if they even have one). I went to Pizza Hut lunch buffet in Upper Arlington, and i brought the cat for some reason. Well the cat jumpe dout of my window while i was inside chowing down. Ron and Cara came back and i told them the cat ran away, so Ron demanded i get a tattoo of their cat on my forearm to pay respects for their loss. So, i got this huge realistic tattoo of a cat on my right forearm. Problem was i got a tattoo of a grey cat and their cat was orange, so i got another tattoo of an orange cat on my other forearm. Somehow an advertising agency caught wind of my fresh tats and paid me $10,000 to pose for a pet store. The photo shoot was me playing with a ball of yarn, they must have taken several hundred photos before i woke up..

king of the late call back

my friend Lutzco is the kind of guy that if you call him at 12:59am he will call you back at 5:44am

gaurdian owl

I got a new tattoo, it is the gaurdian owl.

scenes from Bodega: part 6

My friends from Cleveland were in town visiting. We ended up at Bodega, which is where the jackassery unfolded. My friend spilled a full beer on my other friend's pants. He felt so bad he offered him his pants. By this i mean he took his pants off in the middle of the bar and offered them to his buddy, as he stood there in navy blue briefs. I felt weird to be in this scene....

scenes from Bodega: part 5

My friend from Cleveland was sucessful with a girl at Bodega tonight basded on the pickup line "so, you are obviously good looking.... what els edo you ahve going for you?"

when i left the bar he was still talking to her.