Dick Takes The Piss

Certainly you’ve been reading over on Donewaiting about famous comedian Andy Dick’s wild time in Columbus last weekend. If not I’ll give you the Cliff’s Notes: Andy Dick really loves to pee on things. And not just anything, just about everything! People, places and things! He reportedly tried to soak some fellas in the bathroom of a local gay bar. He landed a direct hit on at least one patron in the bathroom of the Funny Bone Comedy Club (at which the club's managing partner called it one of the worst experiences with a performer in the club's history). He was said to be peeing in cups and throwing them at cars in the Easton Mall parking garage. He was photographed peeing (while simultaneously text messaging??) outside his car in another locale. And at 7:42AM on Monday morning Columbus Police finally sniffed out the giant trail of urine spread all across our city and standing at the end of it was none other than Andy Dick – doing what he does best, apparently – spraying proud lilting arches of warm golden byproduct across the sidewalk and wall of Avenue One, a condominium building at 431 W. 1st Ave. It begs the question: Does Andy Dick have the smallest bladder in Hollywood or is he just the coolest man alive?