TWWL

This week we learned...

• White guys with dreads are pretty fucking awesome.


• Bruce Willis is rumored to be dating 'Perfect Stranger' co-star Tamara Feldman. The 'Die Hard' actor was reportedly spotted shopping for lingerie at a branch of 'La Perla' in Los Angeles with the brunette, who plays a naughty French maid in the new movie.


• You have no civil liberties if you are dead.


• Maps and maps and maps!


• Axl Rose is no match for the big and burly Tommy Hilfiger.


• Gotta remember to call 888.382.1222 from my cell phone.


• Eating at Adriatico’s left me nostalgic for Myles Pizza in Bowling Green.


• The Lindsay are one of the most underrated bands in Columbus.


• And why had I never heard of this band before?


• Wags says the secret to re-heating rice is adding a touch of water before microwaving. Turns out it works on baby kittens, too!


• Just in case those gays try to get all gay and tricky on us, this week a Senate panel approved adding a ban on gay marriage to the U.S. Constitution. What a fucking joke and a waste of taxpayers time and money. I assure you this has nothing to do with Republicans seeking to appeal to certain voters for the November election. Again.


• Tom Hanks might have the worst movie hair since Bobby De Niro in Rocky & Bullwinkle.


• The Cowboy at Mickey’s karaoke claimed he once drove his car 375 miles per hour until it exploded. Karaoke at Mickey’s is one of the true hidden treasures in town.


• Sam Craighead is busy proclaiming that Michael Jordan is better than LeBron James, getting high, and fucking with hoes all day.


• Dan Watson predicts that the Cavs will not lose another game the rest of the year.


• Barry Bonds still sucks.