The Dark Side Of... Eating!

Since I’ve spent the last sixty hours or so either slumped over a toilet or sweating in my bed as a result of eating polluted pasta at The Cheesecake Factory I thought it would be the perfect opportunity to explore this most uncomfortable of human phenomenon known simply as: Food Poisoning.

You see, food poisoning is defined as any illness resulting from the consumption of food contaminated with pathogenic bacteria, toxins, viruses, prions or parasites.

It’s quite a nasty experience. Symptoms typically begin several hours after ingestion and depending on the agent involved, can include one or more of the following: nausea (check), abdominal pain (yep), vomiting (oh yeah), diarrhea (ugh), fever (I’m hot), headache (ouchy) or tiredness (and uh huh). In most cases the body is able to permanently recover after a short period of acute discomfort and illness. We put a stress on the acute discomfort and illness part of that sentence.

The fact that my symptoms occurred within 1-6 hours after eating the food suggests that it was caused by a bacterial toxin rather than live bacteria. Either way it forced me to miss the Necropolis show and the Memorial Day BBQ and that pissed me the fuck off.

I suggest you avoid food poisoning as often as possible and while you’re at it, avoid The Cheesecake Factory, too. And steer clear of Easton for that matter. I swear a Saturday night there is like stepping into the real life Pleasantville. It’s very creepy.

Bottom-line, remember to practice good hygiene before, during, and after food preparation to reduce the chances of contracting an illness. This action of monitoring food to ensure that it will not cause foodborne illness is known as food safety.

Learn it. Live it. Love it.

This has been The Dark Side of... Eating!™

And now, some pictures of bacteria!!




Get well cards can be sent to:

B. Miller
c/o The New Dark Ages
P.O. Box 82018
Columbus, OH 43202